Last night I was at a birthday party here in Hamburg.
When you are at a party in a country where everybody speaks a different language and your not drinking it can make you feel even more awkward than usual as you stand with nothing to say. But what I realized yesterday is that what better opportunity to have an internal self dialogue on the words you have learned for the day. This is a good way to learn a new language.
So I stood amongst a group yesterday who were all yabbering on in German. I had no clue what was being spoken, but with that my eyes roamed the room and out the window, and like the kinder garden game of eye spy I said to myself...
Room - das zimmer
Glass - das glass
Building - das gebaude
Brush - der besen
Chocolate - die schokalade
Air - die luft
Sky - der himmel
Sun - die sonne
Tree - der baum
Easy - Einfach
Funny - Lustig
Impressive I'm sure you'll agree. Quit alcohol, and learn a new language out of utter boredom!
Thursday, July 31, 2008
Wednesday, July 30, 2008
DAY 22 - THE GERMAN GYM
Yesterday was a long miserable day infront of the computer in the sweltering German heat. Come 7 o'clock I was thoroughly despressed. I felt lethargic and lazy. My body felt lifeless. What would I do with my evening that didn't involve sitting infront of the TV or having a drink.?
Myself and my girlfriend had planned to go to the gym earlier in the day, but I wasn't feeling motivated now. 'We'll go tomorrow' I said, as my mood plummeted further.
But as the options ran out, and I really couldn't face watching anymore of my girlfriends favourite Scrubs, I plucked my energy up, and the gym it was.
The gym - which is known as a 'Fitness Studio' in German - was very impressive. Bright and colourful. Squash courts. Big shiny pasma screens. A open space bar and restaurant with outdoor sitting area. Oh, and so many good looking people. Beach blonde stunners for the men, and beefy studs for the women. Not that is was a take your pick, but these people really were the perfect examples of the human form.
It was 8.30PM, but the gym was packed. Not like my former gym on Dublins Clarendon Street where you'd only find a mild scattering of people that late in the day while the staff would constantly air nagging notices that the place was closing in 30 minutes, 15 minutes, 10 minutes etc.
My girlfriend convinced me to do an aerobic boxing class which she usually does. No problem I thought.
There was about 40 of us in the large room. About 37 women and 3 men, including the instuctor who was a 6'3 German Mr Motivator. Thats the best way I can describe him.
Instantly he had the whole group dancing and boxing air at his request. All in German ofcoarse. I had no idea what was going on. Whats more, it was a farcical scene. I thought it was hillarious. A YouTube video classic I thought. They can't be serious can they?
But they were serious. Very serious. And I could't be seen to let down the Irish nation with my uncoordinated steps. I had to get with the programe.
Within moments I too was shouting 'EINS, ZWEI, EINS ZWEI, DREI'.
A hour later I have never been as swetty in my life. It was exactly what I needed.
Myself and my girlfriend had planned to go to the gym earlier in the day, but I wasn't feeling motivated now. 'We'll go tomorrow' I said, as my mood plummeted further.
But as the options ran out, and I really couldn't face watching anymore of my girlfriends favourite Scrubs, I plucked my energy up, and the gym it was.
The gym - which is known as a 'Fitness Studio' in German - was very impressive. Bright and colourful. Squash courts. Big shiny pasma screens. A open space bar and restaurant with outdoor sitting area. Oh, and so many good looking people. Beach blonde stunners for the men, and beefy studs for the women. Not that is was a take your pick, but these people really were the perfect examples of the human form.
It was 8.30PM, but the gym was packed. Not like my former gym on Dublins Clarendon Street where you'd only find a mild scattering of people that late in the day while the staff would constantly air nagging notices that the place was closing in 30 minutes, 15 minutes, 10 minutes etc.
My girlfriend convinced me to do an aerobic boxing class which she usually does. No problem I thought.
There was about 40 of us in the large room. About 37 women and 3 men, including the instuctor who was a 6'3 German Mr Motivator. Thats the best way I can describe him.
Instantly he had the whole group dancing and boxing air at his request. All in German ofcoarse. I had no idea what was going on. Whats more, it was a farcical scene. I thought it was hillarious. A YouTube video classic I thought. They can't be serious can they?
But they were serious. Very serious. And I could't be seen to let down the Irish nation with my uncoordinated steps. I had to get with the programe.
Within moments I too was shouting 'EINS, ZWEI, EINS ZWEI, DREI'.
A hour later I have never been as swetty in my life. It was exactly what I needed.
Tuesday, July 29, 2008
DAY 21 - CRAZY DREAMS
I wonder does a booze free life give you crazier dreams than normal. I 'm usually quite prone to the odd nutty dream, but last nights dream took the biscuit. Its just coming back to me now.
If I can recall...
My good friend Grazer had convinced Ronny Wood (or perhaps it was Keith Wood) to come and speak at some conference he was holding. I have no idea what the conference was about. I think I was helping in the organising in some way.
Grazer even managed to get Ronny (or Keith) to perform. It was an amazingly well organised event, and one to be proud of for Grazer.
After the event Grazer and I decided to go for a spin in a Jaguar car. I'm not sure who owned the Jaguar, but in the dream it was definitly my responsibility.
So as we were speeding down Baggot Street in Dublin, Grazer suddenly decided to put the car into a manical sideways slide, up on the curb, knocking over post boxes etc and generally wrecking the 100k plus car. I couldn't understand why he was doing it. I was begging him to stop, but he was driven (no pun intented) by the dark side.
When finally the car came to a screeching halt, I jumped out and ran to the nearest Burger King to take cover. I had to call the Police on my good friend Grazer. He had gone awol.
When the Police came, Grazer explained that when he was younger his parents cars were stolen for joy rides all the time. Lame excuse Grazer. And with that he was taken away.
In truth it was a bloodly stressful and emotional dream.
I can neither confirm nor deny if Grazer was on the bottle when behind the wheel. Im sure the toxicolligy tests will prove it.
Hmmmm...
A quick Google check on the meaning of my dream tells me:
A car crash dream usually means that you feel like your life is a wreck.
Well that's just great!
If I can recall...
My good friend Grazer had convinced Ronny Wood (or perhaps it was Keith Wood) to come and speak at some conference he was holding. I have no idea what the conference was about. I think I was helping in the organising in some way.
Grazer even managed to get Ronny (or Keith) to perform. It was an amazingly well organised event, and one to be proud of for Grazer.
After the event Grazer and I decided to go for a spin in a Jaguar car. I'm not sure who owned the Jaguar, but in the dream it was definitly my responsibility.
So as we were speeding down Baggot Street in Dublin, Grazer suddenly decided to put the car into a manical sideways slide, up on the curb, knocking over post boxes etc and generally wrecking the 100k plus car. I couldn't understand why he was doing it. I was begging him to stop, but he was driven (no pun intented) by the dark side.
When finally the car came to a screeching halt, I jumped out and ran to the nearest Burger King to take cover. I had to call the Police on my good friend Grazer. He had gone awol.
When the Police came, Grazer explained that when he was younger his parents cars were stolen for joy rides all the time. Lame excuse Grazer. And with that he was taken away.
In truth it was a bloodly stressful and emotional dream.
I can neither confirm nor deny if Grazer was on the bottle when behind the wheel. Im sure the toxicolligy tests will prove it.
Hmmmm...
A quick Google check on the meaning of my dream tells me:
A car crash dream usually means that you feel like your life is a wreck.
Well that's just great!
Monday, July 28, 2008
DAY 20 - THEORY ON HAIR
I may be a bit optimistic with this one, but here goes.
For the past few years I have been losing my hair. Nothing too major, but I have noticed it has been slowly creeping backwards. It´s been a pain in the neck.
I´ve examined the possibility of cures to help my anxiety, but it seems to me that nothing works.
That was until the past week, when I suddenly started feeling the opposite. My hair can´t be growing back, can it? Is it fuller? I don´t know whats going on.
Doing a quick check on Google, I find the following...
After heavy drinking, there are stress reactions that can precipitate hair loss. The more of these bouts of drinking, the greater the stress on your body. Drinking does impact the liver and the liver is a critical organ in managing hormones in your body’s metabolism.
And this...
Alcohol is a diuretic, so it causes accelerated dehydration. A lack of body fluid causes dry and brittle hair. Excessive alcohol consumption can deplete levels of iron in the body, leading to hair loss.
Could it be true? One can dream.
For the past few years I have been losing my hair. Nothing too major, but I have noticed it has been slowly creeping backwards. It´s been a pain in the neck.
I´ve examined the possibility of cures to help my anxiety, but it seems to me that nothing works.
That was until the past week, when I suddenly started feeling the opposite. My hair can´t be growing back, can it? Is it fuller? I don´t know whats going on.
Doing a quick check on Google, I find the following...
After heavy drinking, there are stress reactions that can precipitate hair loss. The more of these bouts of drinking, the greater the stress on your body. Drinking does impact the liver and the liver is a critical organ in managing hormones in your body’s metabolism.
And this...
Alcohol is a diuretic, so it causes accelerated dehydration. A lack of body fluid causes dry and brittle hair. Excessive alcohol consumption can deplete levels of iron in the body, leading to hair loss.
Could it be true? One can dream.
Sunday, July 27, 2008
DAY 19 - WILKOMMEN TO GERMANY
I am sorry for my very short blog entries of late. Life has been quite strained and stressful and my inspiration to write has been minimal. But hopefully things have calmed down now a tiny bit and I can now concentrate on this blog a bit more.
Yesterday morning I departed for Germany, to begin a new phase of my life. I was to get a 6.40am flight so I was up much of the night prior packing my bags.
Dublin Airport at 5.40am was complete chaos. The place was packed. The ques were huge. I do hate Dublin Airport. The place is disorganised, badly layed out,scruffy and dirty. It´s a place where you can gaurentee no matter what time, to find people drinking as the bars are open 24/7.
I saw two couples going on holidays, and the two men where guzzling back beer like there was no tomorrow. At 5.40am! Is that really nessessary? I´ve always hated that type of carry on.
I should say at this point that I´m a bloody awful flyer. It´s really developed in the past couple of years. Pure fear that something is going to go wrong up there, and when it does its going to be...ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!
I spend most of the flight sitting by the window looking out, willing the plane to stay level. Its all irrational I know, but again in recent flights I´d usually try quench the fear with a few glasses of white wine, or if really bad, a couple of stiff whiskeys. This time, I managed not to go for that option, but nevertheless I was paralysed with fear.
Thankfully I survived, and arrived in Hamburg in one piece. The weather in Germany is scorching. Hotter than hell is how I´d describe it.
My girlfriend likes the sun, and she likes to lap it up. I on the other hand can stand it for about 10 minutes before I begin to wither and die. She brought me to a very cool beach bar where people were drinking sexy mojitos and chilled icey beer.
Yes, yes, this would always be the true test of my ability to spend a year off the booze. How am I going to get by, living in another country, the home of beer, with mostly strangers and a party loving girlfriend?
This is where the story will really begin.
Yesterday morning I departed for Germany, to begin a new phase of my life. I was to get a 6.40am flight so I was up much of the night prior packing my bags.
Dublin Airport at 5.40am was complete chaos. The place was packed. The ques were huge. I do hate Dublin Airport. The place is disorganised, badly layed out,scruffy and dirty. It´s a place where you can gaurentee no matter what time, to find people drinking as the bars are open 24/7.
I saw two couples going on holidays, and the two men where guzzling back beer like there was no tomorrow. At 5.40am! Is that really nessessary? I´ve always hated that type of carry on.
I should say at this point that I´m a bloody awful flyer. It´s really developed in the past couple of years. Pure fear that something is going to go wrong up there, and when it does its going to be...ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!
I spend most of the flight sitting by the window looking out, willing the plane to stay level. Its all irrational I know, but again in recent flights I´d usually try quench the fear with a few glasses of white wine, or if really bad, a couple of stiff whiskeys. This time, I managed not to go for that option, but nevertheless I was paralysed with fear.
Thankfully I survived, and arrived in Hamburg in one piece. The weather in Germany is scorching. Hotter than hell is how I´d describe it.
My girlfriend likes the sun, and she likes to lap it up. I on the other hand can stand it for about 10 minutes before I begin to wither and die. She brought me to a very cool beach bar where people were drinking sexy mojitos and chilled icey beer.
Yes, yes, this would always be the true test of my ability to spend a year off the booze. How am I going to get by, living in another country, the home of beer, with mostly strangers and a party loving girlfriend?
This is where the story will really begin.
Saturday, July 26, 2008
DAY 18 - THE UNCLE
Yesterday was a day of packing and getting organised for my big move to Germany.
I met my uncle for lunch. My uncle who has battled pretty hard with the booze himself over the years told me he was also off the sauce, and was to date 31 days off the booze. That is an achievement for him, and I respect him for it. I must say he seemed alot sharper for it.
He identified with me that he´s lost much motivation to go to pubs and clubs. He´d rather go home and watch natural history documentaries.
I hope he manages to stay off it.
I met my uncle for lunch. My uncle who has battled pretty hard with the booze himself over the years told me he was also off the sauce, and was to date 31 days off the booze. That is an achievement for him, and I respect him for it. I must say he seemed alot sharper for it.
He identified with me that he´s lost much motivation to go to pubs and clubs. He´d rather go home and watch natural history documentaries.
I hope he manages to stay off it.
Thursday, July 24, 2008
DAY 17 - THE JUICEMAN
Not much to report on, except of coarse for the fact that I am moving to Germany - arguably the home of beer - on Saturday. I'm just trying to get everything in order for the move. It should be interesting to see how it all works out.
Last night I went over to a friends, who has asked to be called The Juiceman. The Juiceman offered me a classic classic brand of whiskey to drink. I think it was Johnny Walker. The Juiceman decided to read the back label to further tempt me...
'Johnnie Walker Black Label has an enigmatic character. The first sip leaves you with an overwhelming curiosity to discover more. As Black Label's deep taste unfolds a myriad of flavours are revealed in several waves: first, there is an impression of silky richness; then deep and fruity foreground flavours give way to drier peaty nuances, followed by the complementary flavour tones of sweet vanilla and raisins'...yadda yadda ya. You get the idea.
It was tempting. But resist I must, and resist I did.
Instead I drank copious amounts of Coca Cola, and played a blinding set of races on Mario Kart. Which is interesting, because when I was last in The Juicemans place I was inept at the classic game. Not so now.
I'll have to put it down to the lack of alcohol in the system. Alcohol impairs driving after all:-) I showed The Juiceman.
Last night I went over to a friends, who has asked to be called The Juiceman. The Juiceman offered me a classic classic brand of whiskey to drink. I think it was Johnny Walker. The Juiceman decided to read the back label to further tempt me...
'Johnnie Walker Black Label has an enigmatic character. The first sip leaves you with an overwhelming curiosity to discover more. As Black Label's deep taste unfolds a myriad of flavours are revealed in several waves: first, there is an impression of silky richness; then deep and fruity foreground flavours give way to drier peaty nuances, followed by the complementary flavour tones of sweet vanilla and raisins'...yadda yadda ya. You get the idea.
It was tempting. But resist I must, and resist I did.
Instead I drank copious amounts of Coca Cola, and played a blinding set of races on Mario Kart. Which is interesting, because when I was last in The Juicemans place I was inept at the classic game. Not so now.
I'll have to put it down to the lack of alcohol in the system. Alcohol impairs driving after all:-) I showed The Juiceman.
Wednesday, July 23, 2008
DAY 16 - A DRINK WITH TIMOTHY
I hope you like my new blog design. Thanks to Sue and Sink.ie for that.
Yesterday was a day that began with terminal depression which was down to our stalled business investment and proceeded to meander all day long between utter negativity and hopeful optimism.
Basically a solution is needed to our crisis asap or the whole deal could collapse. It's not the best situation in the world. It has added untold pressure to my life right now, including to my relationship with my girlfriend. Lest not forget I am supposed to be moving to Germany on Saturday.
Despite all, in an effort to get my head into a new space, I got all arts and craftsy last night. I went to the Check Inn with Timothy and conducted the first video interview for A Year Off The Booze. I hope to do more of these over time, where I'll basically interview random people in my life and ask them about their life on the booze. So without further ado...
Yesterday was a day that began with terminal depression which was down to our stalled business investment and proceeded to meander all day long between utter negativity and hopeful optimism.
Basically a solution is needed to our crisis asap or the whole deal could collapse. It's not the best situation in the world. It has added untold pressure to my life right now, including to my relationship with my girlfriend. Lest not forget I am supposed to be moving to Germany on Saturday.
Despite all, in an effort to get my head into a new space, I got all arts and craftsy last night. I went to the Check Inn with Timothy and conducted the first video interview for A Year Off The Booze. I hope to do more of these over time, where I'll basically interview random people in my life and ask them about their life on the booze. So without further ado...
Tuesday, July 22, 2008
DAY 15 - MELTDOWN
Yesterday was a bad day. What was supposed to be a day of celebration with the conclusion of our deal for our business, instead stalled again with a last minute problem.
Nevertheless we all went for our planned celebratory meal and drink afterwards. I just wanted to get out of there and go home. The temptation to have a drink was at an all time high.
I said 'fuck it' as I sat at the table. My disappointment was huge and I needed a drink to quench the anxiety. Life was bad in my head and I wanted a big dirty pint.
I told the others at the table who knew about the blog that I was going to have a drink. Pauly had been teasing me all day. She kept telling me how she was going to enjoy her drink when the deal was done.
Timothy was more supportive. He urged me not to have a drink as the waiter poured a bottle of his preferred white wine. The glass in front of me was filled.
I can't explain it, but I didn't touch it. I don't have any clue how I managed to resist. I think I had a sense with my head so messed up that alcohol would be the worst solution under the circumstances. I needed to keep my head leval, take stock and just deal with the problems at hand.
And thats what I hope to do today.
Nevertheless we all went for our planned celebratory meal and drink afterwards. I just wanted to get out of there and go home. The temptation to have a drink was at an all time high.
I said 'fuck it' as I sat at the table. My disappointment was huge and I needed a drink to quench the anxiety. Life was bad in my head and I wanted a big dirty pint.
I told the others at the table who knew about the blog that I was going to have a drink. Pauly had been teasing me all day. She kept telling me how she was going to enjoy her drink when the deal was done.
Timothy was more supportive. He urged me not to have a drink as the waiter poured a bottle of his preferred white wine. The glass in front of me was filled.
I can't explain it, but I didn't touch it. I don't have any clue how I managed to resist. I think I had a sense with my head so messed up that alcohol would be the worst solution under the circumstances. I needed to keep my head leval, take stock and just deal with the problems at hand.
And thats what I hope to do today.
Monday, July 21, 2008
DAY 14 - A BET IS MADE
Two weeks off the booze. Again another pretty unhealthy weekend. I had McDonalds two days in a row. Two McChicken Sandwich meals. I never have McDonalds.
Along with that I'm still guzzling down Coke and sugary tea and coffee. And the result is that this morning I woke up with a horrible gritty feeling on my teeth and tongue, similar in a way to the feeling your mouth has when you wake up after a night of cigarettes and alcohol.
I can feel my teeth dissolving, and I'm getting a tooth ache, so this week I'm going to have to cut my new found sugar addiction.
Last night my business partner Pauly made a bet that I'd never get through this. She thinks I'll have caved by a couple of months. She put 20 quid on the table as a bet proving her confidence.
Thanks for the support Pauly!
Last night it was a friends birthday party but I didn't go. My energy was too low for it. Instead I stayed in and listened to a radio interview with famed Irish journalist Eamonn McCann. It was interesting to hear his upset at how much he has drank in his life. He seemed to think it was a waste of time.
Today myself and my business partners finally sign a deal for our business which is going to make us rich beyond our wildest dreams. After we sign we should be going for a very nice dinner together. That will be testing. It would be a deserved drink after two years of hard work. It would be a celebratory drink and reward for months of toil. And what's more it would be drink for comrades who stuck together during hard times, through thick and thin. Yadda yadda ya.
I must be strong! Be strong!
Along with that I'm still guzzling down Coke and sugary tea and coffee. And the result is that this morning I woke up with a horrible gritty feeling on my teeth and tongue, similar in a way to the feeling your mouth has when you wake up after a night of cigarettes and alcohol.
I can feel my teeth dissolving, and I'm getting a tooth ache, so this week I'm going to have to cut my new found sugar addiction.
Last night my business partner Pauly made a bet that I'd never get through this. She thinks I'll have caved by a couple of months. She put 20 quid on the table as a bet proving her confidence.
Thanks for the support Pauly!
Last night it was a friends birthday party but I didn't go. My energy was too low for it. Instead I stayed in and listened to a radio interview with famed Irish journalist Eamonn McCann. It was interesting to hear his upset at how much he has drank in his life. He seemed to think it was a waste of time.
Today myself and my business partners finally sign a deal for our business which is going to make us rich beyond our wildest dreams. After we sign we should be going for a very nice dinner together. That will be testing. It would be a deserved drink after two years of hard work. It would be a celebratory drink and reward for months of toil. And what's more it would be drink for comrades who stuck together during hard times, through thick and thin. Yadda yadda ya.
I must be strong! Be strong!
Saturday, July 19, 2008
DAY 13 - BACK TO THE MOVIES
Since kicking the booze I have had good reason to go back to one of my main passions in life - watching movies!
Admittedly the movies I have watched have been very mainstream, but nevertheless my movie watching ratio has shot up.
In the last 2 weeks I have watched Back to the Future I, II and III, Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory, The Mist, and tonight I watched Wall.E.
This is a very good for me being a budding film director.
Its often too tempting to go for a pint instead of watching a good movie. Now I have no excuses.
Admittedly the movies I have watched have been very mainstream, but nevertheless my movie watching ratio has shot up.
In the last 2 weeks I have watched Back to the Future I, II and III, Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory, The Mist, and tonight I watched Wall.E.
This is a very good for me being a budding film director.
Its often too tempting to go for a pint instead of watching a good movie. Now I have no excuses.
Friday, July 18, 2008
DAY 12 - SPARKLING LUNCH
I've just had a sickening night of chocolate, Coca Cola and Mario Kart. I feel gross.
Today, I had a lunch meeting with a business associate. Walking towards it, I was quite tempted to make it a liquid lunch. For the first time I had the true sense just to pack this blog in. I felt the pressure to have a drink from my associate would have been too strong.
I got there early so I was sitting alone looking at the menu. Wine would have been the order of the day when the waiter came to take my order. A nice chilled glass of white. Very nice.
Instead I remained strong and had a sparkling water. When my associate came he also had a sparking water.
I'm going to stop calling him my associate now.
In other news, Patrick who is spamming my comment space to death is a nut case!
And I'm moving to Germany next Saturday! Just one week left.
Today, I had a lunch meeting with a business associate. Walking towards it, I was quite tempted to make it a liquid lunch. For the first time I had the true sense just to pack this blog in. I felt the pressure to have a drink from my associate would have been too strong.
I got there early so I was sitting alone looking at the menu. Wine would have been the order of the day when the waiter came to take my order. A nice chilled glass of white. Very nice.
Instead I remained strong and had a sparkling water. When my associate came he also had a sparking water.
I'm going to stop calling him my associate now.
In other news, Patrick who is spamming my comment space to death is a nut case!
And I'm moving to Germany next Saturday! Just one week left.
Thursday, July 17, 2008
DAY 11 - TRUST NO ONE
Right now I'm typing this entry from my lap top in the comfort of my bed. I live five floors above a pub/club. The music reverberating up is thumping. I can hear lots of the conversations of the people outside smoking on the street.
The music now sounds like a Shirly Bassey version of Light My Fire by The Doors. I'll never sleep.
Thanks to the those who have posted positive comments. Its great to get any type of feedback.
Shann in the States posted a comment claiming non alcoholic beer still has alcohol in it?! No way!
I'm Googling that as we speak.
(5 Mins Later)
Hmmmmm. I suddenly feel cheated.
There is infact alcohol content in non alcoholic beer. That's bizarre. I had just assumed there was none.
So lets see. Since I have been off the booze I have drank one bottle of Becks NA and one bottle or Erdinger NA. Becks NA contains 0.3% alcohol and Erdinger contains 0.5% alcohol. So addmittedly its only a smidgen. But what the fuck! Becks and Erdinger have just slyly fucked up my whole year! Excuse my language.
Can I sue somebody?
I'll just have to pretend it never happened. But why would they call is alcohol free, when its not alcohol free? Doesn't that breach some kind of trade rule? False advertising? Yadda yadda ya.
Moving on. I need to reiterate I'm not an alcoholic. And I'm not a recovering alcoholic. I'm just a regular shmo who is perversly deciding to try quit the booze for the year. Call it a lark if you will.
Despite that, I have had quite a few comments of late on the subject of the Alcoholics Anonymous organisation. Now I don't know anything about them as such, but Patrick has decided to let me know the truth through reems of comments. Apparently they are a creepy cult like movement!
Its all too much for me now. Evil lying beer corporations. Evil lying help organisations. Where is the hope for humanity. God dammit!
The music now sounds like a Shirly Bassey version of Light My Fire by The Doors. I'll never sleep.
Thanks to the those who have posted positive comments. Its great to get any type of feedback.
Shann in the States posted a comment claiming non alcoholic beer still has alcohol in it?! No way!
I'm Googling that as we speak.
(5 Mins Later)
Hmmmmm. I suddenly feel cheated.
There is infact alcohol content in non alcoholic beer. That's bizarre. I had just assumed there was none.
So lets see. Since I have been off the booze I have drank one bottle of Becks NA and one bottle or Erdinger NA. Becks NA contains 0.3% alcohol and Erdinger contains 0.5% alcohol. So addmittedly its only a smidgen. But what the fuck! Becks and Erdinger have just slyly fucked up my whole year! Excuse my language.
Can I sue somebody?
I'll just have to pretend it never happened. But why would they call is alcohol free, when its not alcohol free? Doesn't that breach some kind of trade rule? False advertising? Yadda yadda ya.
Moving on. I need to reiterate I'm not an alcoholic. And I'm not a recovering alcoholic. I'm just a regular shmo who is perversly deciding to try quit the booze for the year. Call it a lark if you will.
Despite that, I have had quite a few comments of late on the subject of the Alcoholics Anonymous organisation. Now I don't know anything about them as such, but Patrick has decided to let me know the truth through reems of comments. Apparently they are a creepy cult like movement!
Its all too much for me now. Evil lying beer corporations. Evil lying help organisations. Where is the hope for humanity. God dammit!
Wednesday, July 16, 2008
DAY 10 - GOING AWOL
For the past 10 days my life has been very pressurized and stressful. I am trying to conclude a business deal which has dragged on for a couple of months. Added to which I am due to leave the country in a few days to be closer to my girlfriend. And if that wasn't enough there has been some family illness in recent days to heighten anxieties.
Today all the issues came together and I was really feeling the strain. I was tempted to go awol. I was tempted to jump on a plane and go on a massive bender on somewhere very remote island.
While working in the bar last night, I spoke with a couple of customers about The Rolling Stones legend Ronnie Wood. For those of you who are not aware, Ronnie (61) who has always struggled with the booze, has gone awol in Ireland in recent days with a 19 year old Russian.
That seems like quite a good idea to me right now.
Instead of taking those drastic measures, I went to the gym again - 4 days in a row now - and afterwards popped into a bar where my friend was playing jazz. I had a Lucozade. I got speaking to someone who is actually about to launch a charitable addiction help website.
There were lots of other people around. But I felt boring, very boring. My craving to be in such an environment has faded, and instead I went home and watched Back To The Future III.
Tuesday, July 15, 2008
DAY 9 - WORKING IN A BAR
About 5 years ago I used to work in a very cool and very small bar in Dublin city centre.
Today I got a call from the manager asking me would I do a few hours as they were stuck for staff.
So I've just got in after the 7 till finish shift.
It's a great bar. As its so tiny, you get to meet and talk to interesting people all the time.
I met two ex police from the UK who now work in insurance. I met a man who works for big tobacco. He does exactly the same job as that guy in Thank You For Smoking. Evil stuff.
For the last hour I was unable to avoid watching a couple at the bar get very physical with each other. They needed a room badly. I had no where to look. She was very very drunk. She was drinking her pint of beer with a straw!
Apart from all, I was offered a drink twice! I managed to say no both times. I think I deserve a back slap for that.
I remember my time working in bars full time. Those after work drinks with the rest of the staff were so rewarding.
Tonight a friend I haven't seen in a while dropped in as I closed up. He's never been the type that has needed to drink; he can just as easy go without it that go with it.
So instead we had a couple of cups of tea and some chocolate biscuits. What a lock in!!!
Monday, July 14, 2008
DAY 8 - HANGOVER FREE
This morning marks my first week off the booze. If you were in the room you might hear an audible exhale similar to what you may hear when a teacher calls times up on a test.
Last night I would have murdered a beer. The craving was stronger than ever. After a long day it would have been just the right tonic. What type of task have I set myself I thought? Can I go back on it now? Can I just delete the blog, pretend it never existed?
I went to the local bar Thomas Reads where I met a crazy Canadian singer song writer with a big love for Bono and 'the band'.
For the first time I had a non alcoholic beer. In this case it was a Becks. Its alright, tastes quite similar. But as you know the truth when your drinking it - i.e. there's no alcohol in it - you feel quite the fool. It's pointless. Why not at least drink something that tastes good? Water perhaps?
We stayed around for a bit before heading over to the Globe on Georges Street. A cool bar for cool people.
Amongst others, my friend Timothy was there with his new lady friend. The large group were sat around a huge table. There was no seating space for us. So instead myself, Canadian guy, and my flatmate Falicitas stood a bit outside the arena of chat. We were spare tires. To help kill the awkward airspace between the three of us I decided another drink was needed. Non alcoholic Erdinger this time.
When you are outside the conversational loop its always awkward. But when your drinking at least you have some where to hide. When your not drinking however, there is no where to hide. You just stand and realise, your on your own. For risk of banging my head against the wall, it was time to get chatty. And in my unfortunate case, that meant naturally chatty.
It was time to bust out the Bono stories. Always a reliable starting from zero conversational point. You see in Dublin, its claimed everybody has a Bono story. I told Canadian guy how I once met Bono having a pint in his local while watching a Rugby match one. He was very impressed. He told me how he had went to U2s studio in Dublin just the day prior and knocked on the door hoping they would answer. People are mad! But some are lucky!
30 minutes later, it was time for me to go home. I could have stayed out for a further jaunt up Georges Street, but I had had enough.
I left everyone and walked home. I called my girlfriend and told her I was drunk on 2 non-alcoholic beers. She told me she hopes I quit my crusade next week. She is terrified about me being judgmental on her going forward. I again attempted to put her mind at ease on that matter.
One thing I realised last night was how this really is a big deal for people. You tell someone you've quit drinking, and they are stunned. Especially if you are a non alcoholic.
My question is, is alcohol really an essential part of life? I know humans have been drinking for hundreds of years. I know we use it to celebrate all the key events in our lives. Does that mean alcohol is an essential? Is it a given? Did God put alcohol on earth with the same intention he put water, earth, fire etc. Am I completely nuts? Is what I am trying to do, akin to somebody giving up food for instance?
I'm not sure I'll ever learn the answers to those questions, but for now one thing I can say is that I feel infinitely better than I did this time last week. Hangover free. And what's more, I'm writing unnaturally long blog entries.
Sunday, July 13, 2008
DAY 7 - THE SMELLY FARM
Last night I did get out of the apartment and went to the Farm organic restaurant on Dublins Dawson Street. I met with about 6 others. My friend Timothy (these aren't real names by the way), was drinking a non alcoholic Erdinger because he was driving to a gig afterwards. I nearly went for the same option, but instead plunged for the apple juice.
The rest of the table indulged in a couple of bottles of white wine, and a few Kir Royals which did look pretty sweet. I got on fine though. No bother. It was officially my first weekend night off the booze.
We met at 6 for dinner and come 9 I didn't have much motivation to stay out. I'm positive if I had been drinking I would have stayed out long afterwards.
I did notice for the first time how conversation became more loud and scattered as the time ticked by. I remember at one point our conversation verging rapidly from Steve Coogan, to fruit, to farting.
Apparently fruit makes you fart?! One at the table went into great detail about his fruity farts. I argued the truth of the statement, but a quick google on the subject does infact confirm that apples and fruit juices in particular do cause flatulence because of the fructose they contain. So I'm doomed. I've drank a lot of apple juice recently.
I was relieved that the bill arrived not long after!
Saturday, July 12, 2008
DAY 6 - I AM HANK MOODY
Over yet another kebab last night, I found myself watching Californication on the box, which after initial reservations is actually quite good.
The show follows Hank Moody, a down on his luck writer who lives in LA. Despite the fact that he gets to sleep with an endless line of hot women, at the end of the day he just can't find inner happiness. Life is tough.
The following scene I think is brilliant. Sums up my exact mood as I write this. I am very glad somebody decided to YouTube it. Well done ludef!
In the scene Hank gives his opinions on blogging while knocking back a tiny bottle of something sweet.
The question I have is, is it really possible to be so darn cool while having a drinking problem?If so, I may just go back and start drinking very heavily.
Enjoy...
Friday, July 11, 2008
DAY 5 - MY FIRST COMMENT ANSWERED!
My flatmate is telling me that it is actually quite boring to be the perfect human being, after I had jokingly told her that tomorrow is the day I become just that.
The reason tomorrow I become the perfect human being, is because up until today and including today I have been pretty unhealthy with my diet.
Dousing myself with Coca Cola is clearly not going to get me through the year. I feel quite miserable today for it.
I had my first comment yesterday! Hurrah I say. It went like this:
"If you are not an alcoholic, why are you quitting drinking? I think I would rather enjoy drinking if I could drink in moderation and therefore wasn't an alcoholic..."
From Mary Christine
I should probably answer this question in a bit more detail than I've previously explained.
I have wanted to try quit drinking for a long time now as I have come to notice the negative effects alcohol has on me. They are not over bearing affects, but for instance, the day after I drink I would say my productivity would drop perhaps 40%.
I also feel generally miserable the day after I drink. I feel groggy, and lazy, and those two factors in themselves get me down.
I have noticed the negative affects alcohol has on a lot of people in my life including friends and family members. This has contributed to bring me to this point.
I would obviously be concerned about health effects brought about through associated smoking and junk food binges. And with heart disease in my family I do have to be a bit more aware than most.
I have always admired comedians and athletes who claim not to drink, but appear to get by with the same, if not more gusto for life than drinkers. How do they do that?
And finally, I remember a time in my life when I was pre 16 when drink wasn't a required tool to socialize. We all got on fine back then, but now there is a certain reliance on alcohol to get through the most menial of events.
And finally, I see my year as a challenge. A big bloody challenge. That in itself is exciting.
I have no doubt that some psycho analyst could reduce me based on this to some sort of tortured individual and they could be right! My little brother read the blog yesterday and told me I sounded nuts. But-what-cha-gonna-do?
Today is Friday. Sound the alert!
Thursday, July 10, 2008
DAY 4 - JUNK FOOD
I called my girlfriend yesterday, who lives in Germany at about 5.30PM. She was having a drink with a few friends at the launch of something cool.
I had planned to go to the gym after the phone call, but instead my mood sank just enough that I lost all motivation. If she's out having a drink, then I want to be out having a drink too! That was my dense attitude. If she's out being socialable and fun, then I want to be out being socialable and fun. It's a stupid response I know, but I'm pretty sure that has been a prevailing attitude that has led me to drink on most occasions since I started.
It doesn't just have to be my girlfriend out to make you feel left out. Simply put its tough to stay in when others are out. It's very tough. And there may good reason why you want to stay in. Maybe you need to do some work. Or maybe your too hungover from the night before. Maybe you just need the rest after a weeks work.
But if your 25 in Dublin, people are out all the time, so the temptation is always there. You also never know what your going to miss. You usually miss nothing; but you still dare not risk it.
Anyway, I decided instead of going to the gym to do the exact opposite. So I went to the local fast food joint and got a quarter pounder, chips and a can of Coke. At 5.30PM! Thats the behavior of somebody straggling home at 5.30 in the morning, not 5.30 in the day time.
The quarter pounder was doused in garlic sauce. The chips were fried to a biscuit. And the Coke was so so good. It added to the can I already had in the fridge waiting for later.
If its not one addiction its another. There's no hope for humanity. We're all fucked.
I'm so over Mondays hangover at this stage. I can can definitly feel tough days ahead. I have been invited to a beach party tonight. Yes ladies and gentlemen, they have beach parties in Dublin apparently. Club Tropicana drinks are free and all that jazz.
I've got to get my head around this whole gig.
Wednesday, July 9, 2008
DAY 3 - RESTAURANT
Yesterday at about 4 o' clock my first cravings for an after work beer hit in. It started deep down in my belly. A craving for that kick; that unknown quality that you can't get from a regular fizzy drink. The alcohol kick. I craved the alcohol kick.
I think it was also down to the fact that yesterday was very sunny. And in Ireland that is another good excuse to drink. There are plenty of nice bars in the city centre that have out door seating areas. My favorite being something like the Bailey. You can have a nice slow pint while watching the punters go by.
In the end, I went to a restaurant off Baggot Street with my friend Timothy. It was a bit pricey for the quality of the food. When I considered what to order for a drink I was genuinely considering asking for the non alcoholic beer. But I figured that would be a cop out.
My friend Mattaus has been off the drink for a short while - I don't expect it to be long term - and drinking non alcoholic beer. It just doesn't seem right.
So instead I order a 3.95 apple juice. Where are the apples coming from? Bloody hell. 3.95!
Nevermind, as they had no apple juice left. So instead I went for the easy option of Coca Cola. You can't beat the feeling. Very soon I'll need to start a blog called A Year Off The Coke.
The Coke was served in the plastic bottle, with a warm glass. Lovely.
The table opposite us had a family of about 6 all sitting around. I watched as the waitress served up a nice chilled bottle of white wine. I watched as she poured slowly into each glass. It was like a surreal scene from a movie. People were laughing heartedly in slow motion. I was like one of those characters in Requiem for a Dream. I could even hear that music in my head.
They all lifted there glasses and clinked.
Yes I wanted a beer.
But I survived.
Tuesday, July 8, 2008
DAY 2 - SUSPICIONS ABOUND
I broke the news to a couple of friends and my girlfriend about my new blogging antics yesterday. Yesterday being my first day without a drink under my new regime.
My girlfriend lives in Germany where they love the beer. She had a degree of suspicion in her voice after I broke it to her. She worries I will become annoyingly preachy about the whole thing. I know she wouldn't stand for that. Few can stand my preachiness as is, so I'll have to be careful.
I am to move to Germany in a couple of weeks to be closer to her. With that in mind my girlfriend thinks this is probably not the best time to attempt such an audacious attempt. If anything its good reason to drink more.
Yesterday went by fine though. With the hangover I had, I had little desire to drink anyway. I was working late, and it was muted by my friend Timothy that we go for a couple of scoops. Instead we went to the movies. I haven't been in a while. We went to see The Mist which was brilliant. With that, I replaced my alcohol craving with an overdose of sugar provided by the good people at Coca Cola.
We both discussed how Coke is the best hangover cure. Have you ever noticed that? When you wake up with a dry mouth, and a dodgy stomach feeling, one gulp of Coke is like heaven. Well, maybe not heaven. But certainly very satisfying.
Maybe I should get Coke to sponsor this blog?
Monday, July 7, 2008
DAY 1 - HANGOVER
I've had this idea for a long time now. It's a simple one. I'm going to attempt to go a whole year without touching the booze! And what's better, I'm going to blog it!
Yes ladies and gentlemen, this mornings hangover was the last straw. 6 pints of beer and 2 glasses of whiskey last night has left me feeling very much the worse for wear.
I just don't enjoy hangovers at all. The ill feeling and alcohol blues they bring far out weighs the entertaining waffle that was spoken into the early hours.
At this point I must clarify, that I'm not an alcoholic. Far from it. In the past week I've been out a couple of times. But as is the Irish way, one or two drinks is never enough. I might be considered the classic binge drinker like so many others.
To give a brief background on who I am, while trying to maintain an element of mystery, I am - The Boozness. In real life I'm a 25 year old from Dublin. I run a successful website. I have a girlfriend who lives in another country. And apart from that I like to watch Jeremy Kyle in the morning. And that's as interesting as it gets.
With all my friends, my family and my girlfriend liking to knock back the gargle, this year that I'm about to attempt will be a serious challenge. In Dublin, there is always an excuse to drink -
a birthday, a wedding, a funeral, a christening, Friday night, Saturday night, Thursday night, Bank Holidays, Valentines Day, Christmas, New Years, launches, lunches, going aways, comings homes, just one, the last one, last orders, a few tinnys, watching the football, having the hearts to hearts, yadda yadda yadda. You get the idea.
This year will see a whole new me. A socially reclusive me perhaps. A less entertaining me maybe. A very depressed me - possibly. A bored and lonely me - who knows?
Spinning a positive, this year could see a healthy energetic full of the joys of spring me. Thats the goal.
I'm going to try and update this blog on a daily basis. It will cover my opinions on alcohol, and also the challenges I come up against on a day to day basis. I've no idea how it will all work out. Thanks for reading.
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